My mom had a small stroke four months ago and was having a tough time doing things around the house for herself. Cooking has become difficult because she lost partial use of her right arm. Her knees where also bad from years of working on a farm. I noticed she wasn’t attending to her hygiene as well as she did before the stroke.

Recently, we received a phone call from the hospital letting us know she lost her balance in the shower and fell. My husband and I discussed some options. We knew that Mom could no longer safely live by herself; however, we knew that putting her in assisted living would take an emotional toll on her and us. Even if she was ready to go to assisted living, we couldn’t afford it. So, we decided the best plan was to invite Mom to live with us.  

I work as a nurse so the first thing I know I had to do was to get her to feel good about herself again. Good hygiene habits are an important part of that. My main concern was bathing her. I was worried about being able to move her to the shower and in and out of it, safely. At the hospital I work at, there were multiple people to help the patient get showered without injury. At home, it was just me in the morning. I decided to avoid the shower and bathe her in bed instead. 

I talked with her about allowing me to help wash her each morning. At the beginning, she was shy and reluctant; but after a while, we started to enjoy the time together. I would wash her body with soft, warm bathing cloths and she would talk to me about growing up and tell stories about my father and her. It is not easy to care for my mother, but we make the best of it. I have two kids and sometimes things can get very stressful; but, she provides emotional support for me while I take care of her. She was always there for me and now I get to return the favor.